One on one time with our children is so important, but it's equally hard to come by as we try to manage our busy schedules. Not only do I have to sync my calendar with my wife, but I also have to start syncing Hunter's and Skye's social calendars and extra-curricular activities. It's a daunting prospect most days to have all four of us in the same room together for longer than 30 minutes at a time. So, I can't imagine how families with more children achieve quality family time together.
On Saturdays, if things are slow at the zoo, where Donna works, then she'll take Hunter with her for the day and I will spend time alone with Skye. That was our arrangement today, and Skye and I got to spend the day enjoying a slow start, French toast and banana for breakfast, the typical four or five loads of laundry cycling in the basement, and today, the first real snowstorm of the season, so shoveling out the driveway and walkway and throwing down ice-melt was in order. Skye was only too happy to do ice-melt duty.
Once all of the chores were finished, and the laundry was on its third load, I took Skye sledding at the elementary school they attend. The school sits on a slope and it's a thrilling experience for anyone still in the single-digit age range. I am convinced that one of the most beautiful sounds in the world is a child's uninhibited laughter as they swoosh down a hill of fresh snow. As we were approaching the school, Skye said, "I love it when it's just you and me."
I responded, "I do too, honey."
It's been a beautiful day with Skye, and it makes me look forward even more to the special trip Hunter and I have planned for next month on his winter break when we head up to Maine.
The blessings of those moments when multi-tasking can stop and living the moment is all that's required is precious. It's rare to find those moments of complete presence and I'm going to try even harder this year to soak them up as they happen. My little girl is already well into her kindergarten year and that only means her life will become peppered with more activities and as such, so will mine.
So, Skye, I love it when it's just you and me; and Hunter, I love it when it's just me and you. You each teach me more about what's truly important than any other people. So, I really wonder, is it the parent who teaches the child or the child who awakens the child within the parent to remind us of what our priorities need to be?
Regardless, I thank you both. And Donna, let's see if we can find that time to say, "I love it when it's just me and you." I think it's time for a sitter.
Now, let's see if I can find it with Donna, too :)
- Stacy Graffam
- I'm a lesbian mom in an inter-racial relationship, living in Bergen County, NJ. My wife and I are raising two beautiful children, an eleven year-old son and a six year-old daughter. I'll be sharing our adventures in faith and parenting on a regular basis. My entries are also published in Gay Parent Magazine (www.gayparentmag.com).